| All of you have had your children say this to you at | | | | the question etc. Then say to the child, "Do you get |
| one time or another, no matter what type of | | | | it now? Was I any help to you? I know it's hard to |
| schooling they have had. | | | | understand, I didn't get it right away either!" This |
| What is the child REALLY trying to tell you? | | | | way the child knows that they aren't stupid, Mom or |
| Do they hate school? | | | | Dad (that always knows everything) didn't get it at |
| Do they hate learning? | | | | first either, but they figured it out. |
| Is it too hard for them? | | | | 2) Are they bored? Does it seem to the child like |
| Is it boring? | | | | they are constantly going over the same thing and |
| Watching your child as they learn or as they are | | | | they already gave the answer three times? |
| doing their homework should give you clues to the | | | | Some children catch on fast, but give the outward |
| answers to this problem. | | | | appearance like they don't have a clue what the |
| Most children will only give an adult 'hints' about what | | | | answer is. They are bored! For this type of child it is |
| they really mean, they sure aren't going to come | | | | easier to rephrase the question a few ways and see |
| right out and tell you. Not because they don't want | | | | if you get the same answer each time; if you do, |
| to; they don't want you to be disappointed in them. | | | | they have got it, go on to something else. |
| A child wants to 'please' the parent and doesn't want | | | | 3) Do you loose patience and after a while just sit |
| them to feel like their child is different in the respect | | | | down next to them and say something like; "I am |
| that the child can not learn fast enough. | | | | going to sit right here until you get your work done, |
| For some children there are other reasons... Because | | | | so just get busy." OR Eventually you are so |
| they don't know how, They don't know how to put | | | | frustrated that you 'give' them the answers. |
| it into words, They are afraid that you may get mad | | | | Sorry, both wrong things to do. No one sits next to |
| or They would rather ignore it than to make a big | | | | them in school; no one will stand next to them in the |
| thing about it. | | | | work place either. Help them to learn life as well as |
| So, where does that leave the parent? | | | | subjects and they will benefit double. |
| You have to figure it out for yourself; but this isn't | | | | 4) They can't concentrate! |
| as hard as it sounds if you look at these factors. Kids | | | | This is a problem with most kids; they seem to get |
| will always give clues as to what is bothering them in | | | | side tracked by the smallest thing. Like my |
| ways that usually only a parent will notice if you look | | | | granddaughter says; Focus, Focus, Focus. She will just |
| hard enough. | | | | stop in the middle of what she is doing and close her |
| If the child is constantly fidgeting while they should | | | | eyes and say her 'magic words' and it seems to help. |
| be doing their homework: 1) They don't understand | | | | Usually this type of youngster is trying to look at a |
| what they are supposed to be doing 2) They are | | | | whole picture instead of taking things in small pieces |
| bored and think they are wasting time, 3) They are | | | | at a time. They are worried that they won't get |
| waiting for you to sit along side of them to help or | | | | finished in time, or they are afraid that they will get |
| give the answers 4) They have a problem | | | | to something that they don't understand so they are |
| concentrating. | | | | looking ahead too much. Put a piece of paper under |
| Now all you have to do is figure out which one of | | | | the words as they read them or you do. This way |
| these things it really is, but, you are the parent, and it | | | | you are only looking at a certain amount of words at |
| may take some time, but you will make a major | | | | one time and you have to 'focus' to know what is |
| breakthrough when you come up with the answer. It | | | | coming next. |
| will make all of your teaching techniques from that | | | | It isn't easy for a child to organize their learning, so |
| time on much simpler. You will have broken the code, | | | | the parent or teacher has to help them learn how. If |
| so to speak, and managed to find that special bond | | | | you look at it in a simple form: learning is organizing |
| that it will take for your child to learn. | | | | thoughts and words that we will use at one point |
| How do you go about this? | | | | and time in our life and put in our memory banks for |
| 1) One of the most important things you can do is to | | | | fast retrieval. It is their first step in learning to |
| open communication with out pointing a finger and | | | | organize their lives and they will learn these basics in |
| making the child feel 'stupid' as they put it. | | | | a lot of ways through out their lives. |
| Ask them if they understand the question, rephrase | | | | Make learning fun and a child will carry their education |
| it several different ways, use something that they | | | | with them for a lifetime make it hard and boring and |
| can relate to as an example instead of the wording in | | | | they will forget it tomorrow. |